transitions. like in a caterpillar, the transformation from a crawling insect (?) to a something beautiful.
in the cocoon, it's the very struggling itself that produces the butterfly.
He doesn't want to take me out of the suffering.
no, He wants to touch, help, mould, strengthen me through and during this suffering.
it is during times like these, times of hurt and trials and pain and confusion, that intimacy with our heavenly Daddie intensifies, a result that mountaintop experiences cannot achieve.
when i'm faced with a difficult situation and i'm forced to struggle, it doesn't imply that He doesn't love me. it doesn't imply God doesn't love you, it is an indication that He's preparing me to fly, the way i was born to fly.
and if i embrace this transition instead of fear it, it becomes empowering.
and i'll emerge as this incredibly strong, incredibly empowered, incredibly gorgeous person that He's always intended for me to be.
that's the gist of today's sermon, or what i got out of it, at least.
God, let everything i sang today in church be a prayer from the bottom of my heart, with everything i am, i want to honour You.
in my thoughts, i want to honour You
in the words i speak, i want to honour You
in how i eat, i want to honour You
in how i treat my body, i want to honour You
in how i read Your Word, i want to honour You
in how i treat my friends, i want to honour You
in how i treat people i don't like, i want to honour You
in the music i listen to, i want to honour You
in the way i do my work, i want to honour You
when i sing, i want to sing to honour You
in how i prioritize, i want to honour You
in how i manage my time, i want to honour You
and i'm not assuming that it'll be easy, but i want to do it, and i will do it, God, because i love You, and it's hard struggling on my own and i don't want to struggle on my own anymore.
i looked, and i saw what i can be, if only Your Spirit works through me, if only i work through Your Spirit. it's not gonna be easy, but Lord God, what You've conceived in my spirit, let no one abort. thank You so much, for everything, and i can't even begin to express myself sufficiently.
He was with me, you know.
He still is. when i was doing laundry (it's 3.06am and i'm waiting for my things in the dryer), i felt Him. in the laundry room. as i fold my clothes here, in my room. He's with me.
(SUPER TIRING FOR HANDS. HAD TO HANDWASH TRENCH COAT, WHICH LEAKED COLOUR. TSKKK.)
and i officially give permission, to all of you, to rebuke me as harshly as you like, if you ever catch me doing/saying/whatever-ing something that reflects badly on my Jesus, okay?
but like. don't verbally abuse me or anything, i cannot take it one. hahahaha.
life's so awesome, just because He's so awesome, if for nothing else.
heheheh. these are nice, super super lame (without even trying to be) people.
i hope that through all your rubbish circumstances, you fall in love with Jesus again, because He's desperately in love with you. "seek, seek, seek, and you will find Me."
hot picture of me. :)
